Protestants, Let’s Give Individual Confession Another Chance

Pastor blessing congregant

Growing up, individual confession was a relic of another time in another Church. I’d seen examples in movies like Sound of Music and The Nun’s Story. My Protestant grandmother told me about being left in the car each week as a teenager, while her Catholic friend was forced to go confession with her family. 

Another friend, who had memorized the Latin Mass in its entirety as a pre-Vatican II altar boy, entertained me with stories of made-up confessions to prank the priests. But from the perspective of the twenty-first century, individual confession didn’t feel very relevant, even in the Masses I attended with friends.

Then, I visited my grandfather in Italy. While in Rome, we visited Santa Maria Maggiore, a massive basilica second only to the Vatican itself in size and reputation. Twenty or thirty confessionals lined the walls. 

There weren’t even any pews—the confessionals were the only furniture. It was a stunning architectural statement, completely refocusing attention on a sacrament that was relatively obscure—or so I had thought. 

Each confessional bore flags, often three or four, representing the languages spoken by the priests inside. Red and green lights indicated whether the priest was inside. Most were green, and numerous people lined up in front of confessionals bearing the flag of their country. 

It felt like stepping into another ecclesiological world, one where individual confessions were an important part of many Christians’ lives.

Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

Of course, in most places, confession is greatly diminished in importance. Since Vatican II, Catholics are normally only required to confess once a year. In mainline Protestantism, it’s been largely abolished for centuries. 

Among Protestants, the greatest focus on individual confessions is undoubtedly in the Episcopal Church, but there’s not much focus there to begin with. The 1978 Book of Common Prayer lays out very few exhortations about the sacrament, other than saying it is open to anyone at any time.

Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

Most Episcopal priests do not offer scheduled times for confession, except sometimes on Ash Wednesday or Good Friday. And, perhaps more to the point, it’s not a big part of Episcopal church culture.

I never really noticed any of this, except to appreciate confession’s diminished importance. In the stories I had heard, individual confession was just another instrument used to create shame. 

All that changed a few months ago. Thanks to my YouTube algorithms, I discovered a new group of vloggers (video bloggers) and social media influencers:  young, devout women who were returning to various aspects of traditional Catholicism.

I know I just lost some of you at “traditional Catholicism.” Hang with me here.

Kneeler with bells for Catholic Eucharist
Photo by Grant Whitty on Unsplash

Before we go further, I want to note that I do not believe that confession to a clergy member is necessary for salvation. I certainly do not think that it should be a mandatory part of a church’s teaching, as it was for my grandmother’s friend. In my opinion, the shame and guilt surrounding the pre-Vatican II confessional is spiritually and mentally unhealthy.

But.

The women I found online were embracing regular confession for a completely different set of reasons. They didn’t just talk about it as a form of obedience to Church teaching. Rather, they embraced it because they found that individual confession can radically reshape Christians’ lives and their relationships with God.

Individual confession in an office
Photo by Annie Theby on Unsplash

Of course, there might be important adaptations that need to take place for a Protestant context–adaptations that will differ for each denomination. But here’s the bottom line:  we can encourage confession to clergy or other trusted people as a means of spiritual growth, without deeming it necessary for salvation.

Why is it so important, though? Why might the mainline Protestant church consider individual confession as a means of spiritual growth?

1. Confession reshapes lives through the discipline of recollection. 

Have you ever had a spiritual practice that involved recollecting your day or week? Maybe at the end of each year, you go over the previous twelve months? If so, you’ve probably experienced how helpful it can be to identify life patterns and reflect on whether they’re useful.

Sign saying "confession" in three languages
Photo by Annie Theby on Unsplash

Regular confession builds this practice in. People who go to confession prepare by spending time looking back over the last seven days. They recall the times they followed God’s call and the times they didn’t.

The Catholic women I watched measured their actions against a variety of yardsticks. Some use the Ten Commandments or another Biblical set of guidance. Others use meditations or guidance from their church leadership. The method isn’t the point—it can easily change depending on denominational or personal beliefs.

This practice of recollection is not new, even outside of confession. St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits, also asked his followers to review their relationship with God each day in a prayer called the Examen. He knew that simply recollecting each week allows us to recognize healthy and unhealthy patterns in our lives—and to start changing them.

2.  Confession can reshape lives by curtailing shame.

Person holding arms wide on a beach
Photo by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash

Shame researcher Brene Brown explains that “if we share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can’t survive. If we share our shame story with the wrong person, they can easily become one more piece of flying debris in an already dangerous storm.” 

As I talked about two weeks ago, postmodern technology leaves very few places for people to safely confess experiences of shame. And, even if we have other, trustworthy people in our life, there are going to be things we can’t confess to them. 

Sometimes you have to keep things private from your loved ones for their own sake. Other times, you simply can’t bring yourself to tell them something that might ruin the relationship.

Man praying on a park bench
Photo by Martin Péchy on Unsplash

Yet the alternative—keeping things entirely to ourselves—breeds more shame. That’s where individual confession comes in. You can probably think of a time when a secret ate you up—maybe it even caused mental health problems or spurred you to make a decision you regret.

Confessing in a private setting, to a safe person, can help shame have less hold. Of course, too often, clergy have been the “wrong person” to share shameful stories with. That’s a place where the culture around individual confession needs to change.

3.  Confession can reshape lives by reminding us of forgiveness. 

Each individual confession concludes with an absolution. Traditionally, it often includes encouragement from the clergy. 

While forgiveness is a central part of the Christian tradition, most people could benefit from a regular reminder about it. When we’re forgiven after listing our sins, it’s harder to pretend that forgiveness doesn’t apply to us, or that it somehow can’t cover what we just did.

Of course, for some people, forgiveness after confession is also associated with shame. For those people, an absolution that focuses on our Belovedness, rather than forgiveness, might be more appropriate and equally transformative.

Someone raising their hands in worship
Photo by Carlos Arthur M.R on Unsplash

4.  Confession reshapes lives by creating accountability. 

In the Catholic tradition, this usually involves a certain series of prayers. As I’ve discussed throughout this series, clergy can use a number of other ways to facilitate reconciliation, growth, and reformed behavior. 

They can ask them to seek professional psychological help. Or join a support group. Or take up a gratitude practice, like appreciating a family member once a day throughout the week.

Two buffalos butting heads
Photo by Uriel Soberanes on Unsplash

Many pastors preach about practices that their entire congregation can use to reform. And that’s very helpful. 

But sometimes, those practices need to be personalized. And some congregants who are struggling with big problems might also need a clergy member to help keep them accountable.

5. Confession reshapes lives through regularity. 

Currently, I go to confession once a year on Ash Wednesday. There’s no way I can remember all of my sins from the year—I can’t even remember all of the big ones. Even if I did, there’s nowhere near enough time to go through everything. 

But more importantly, throughout that year, shame has built up. It’s become easier to buy into the stories that beat me down and tell me there’s no hope of being forgiven. And I’ve lost months of opportunities for accountability and focused spiritual growth.

Man kneeling on the beach

In other words, going once a year can defeat the point. In order to fully reap the benefits above, confession needs to be regular.


I get that this idea of regular, individual confession is going way out on a limb for most of my readers. And not so long ago, I was pretty skeptical, too. Individual confession is just such a foreign concept in mainline Protestant culture. 

But it’s important to recognize that it doesn’t have to look like Catholic or Episcopal confession. You don’t even have to call it confession—you can call it spiritual direction or just “Honest Talk with Pastor X.” It can happen in your office or over technology. 

Individual confession taking place over coffee
Photo by Joshua Ness on Unsplash

And it definitely doesn’t need to be a huge drag on your time. If you want to minimize the time per person, you can teach your parishioners to prepare for confession ahead of time and ask them to save chit-chat for coffee hour.

Traditionally, in Catholic churches where confession is regularly practiced, it only takes three-to-five minutes per person. For an average congregation, once they get comfortable with the practice, that’s only an hour or two out of your week.

But the difference it can make is profound.


Do you think individual confession could help your church? Comment below, and let me know!

3 Important Rules for Using Technology in Church

Young man uses tech

Looking for a quick fix that’ll bring more Millennials into your church? Technology might seem like the best answer. It seems like everyone, not just young adults, is glued to their smartphones nowadays.

Much technology

The problem is, technology in church can become a trap. If you google it, you’ll find blogs like this one, which lists a number of ways your congregation can become more tech-savvy.

This article lists many potentially good ideas for certain churches. But it suggests that these strategies can or should be applied indiscriminately. Most churches use technology like that, implementing the most popular technological trends as a way to conform to postmodern culture.

And when they do, that technology can become a liability, not a boon.

As a pastor, you’re working hard to meet the spiritual needs of the community you serve—to facilitate connection with God during worship, or to connect people to one another in fellowship, for example. 

Women in fellowship

Used properly, technology in church should be just one tool in your toolkit to achieve those ends. It’s certainly not a tool you should ignore. But ultimately, it’s a means, not an end. 

So here are three basic rules for seamlessly integrating technology into your worship service—while avoiding the pitfalls that can hinder connection with God and others.

Rule 1:  Let technology in church serve you, not the other way around.

Slide projector

Whatever technology you use, it needs to be concretely meeting the spiritual needs of you and your congregation. In worship, this will probably mean facilitating focus on the service. For instance, if people in your congregation are distracted by bulletins, you may want to use screens instead. 

Or perhaps, you may want to use technology in church to directly facilitate a connection with the Holy Spirit. Dimmed lights or electronic music are common examples.

Technology in church through music

But it’s important to think carefully before installing anything, because there’s a key difference between conforming to the culture and creatively responding to the culture’s spiritual needs. Obviously, we’re aiming for the latter. 

Conforming to tech culture means creating glitchy or distracting technological experiences for the sake of technology itself. Ultimately, this approach draws attention away from the sermon, Eucharist, or overall connection with the Holy Spirit.

To use technology in church to meet the spiritual needs of your community, you need to get a sense of your goals. Not just goals for worship in general but for your worship, specifically.

Empty church

What’s the reason you’re here every Sunday? Why do people come to your church instead of the one across town? A small, contemplative church will have very different answers to those questions than a megachurch, and for good reason.

Once you have your answers in mind, you can ask how technology will further that specific identity and your unique worship goals.

For instance, perhaps you are expanding pastoral care to the sick and homebound. Live-streaming your services could help you do that. Or, maybe you want people to be focusing on the altar rather than leafing through bulletins during Eucharist. Screens could help keep people’s attention at the front instead of down at the floor.

Sick woman

This article from Tithely and this article from Christianity Today lists a number of reasons why technology could be helpful for you. 

There’s an important caveat:  they assume that every church should be pursuing all of their technological ideas. As I said above, I don’t think that’s a thoughtful approach. But you can use the articles to get some ideas about what your specific goals are and then think about how technology can serve you.

Once you have thought through the purpose of technology in your church, you’re ready to think about the specific form it will take in the service.

Rule 2:  Simplify

Simplification is a key difference between technology in the secular world and technology in church. 

Technology in the secular world is created to make us more efficient. To help us do more things, faster. It usually ends up cluttering our brains and our calendars to the max. Which often draws us away from God.

Distracted people

As a result, we live in a society that is often distracted and distractable, two qualities which hinder a relationship with the Holy Spirit in our midst.

If you put up technology in church as a way of conforming to society, you might continuing that trend. You could put up screens with announcements that advertise church events before and after worship. Or maybe you could create images to go along with each part of your sermon so that no one gets bored.

Most of the time, these uses of technology in church will just continue damaging cultural trends.

Instead, make your technology simple. Minimize visual and audial busy-ness. 

Black white space

If you’re using slides during your sermon to emphasize a point, only use a few words or images at once. Make sure they don’t distract attention from your sermon, but rather draw attention back to your words. Create lots of white space on the slide. Rotate through slides very slowly.

If you’re projecting music, try not to cram a whole hymn onto the screen. Instead, you could consider putting up only the words to a familiar tune. Before and after the service, don’t put up announcements—instead, leave the screen blank or put up a calming image to help people settle in to worship.

And size is important too. Too big, and it will distract people from what you’re doing up front. Too small, and people will be squinting. Make it the Goldlilocks size for your sanctuary space.

Simple technology in church

And, most importantly, remember that technology in church is serving the purpose of worship, not the other way around.

Rule 3:  Be good at it. 

You know that sound of nails on a chalkboard? That’s how it feels to this Millennial, at least, when technology in church goes awry.

Millennial frustrated by technology

Recently, I sat through a service that involved a slideshow, with pictures accompanied by music. The idea of the slideshow was wonderful—it served the purposes of worship that day. And the effort was there, put in by the pastor and other dedicated lay volunteers. 

But ultimately, the technology was glitchy and the presenters didn’t know how to create a high-quality presentation. In the end, the execution undercut the wonderful idea and effort that had been put in.

The slideshow kept reverting to the home screen of the PC. People kept having to jump up and adjust the audio, which fluctuated between too loud and too quiet. The music did not taper off at the end of the slideshow, but cut off abruptly in the middle, ruining the atmosphere.

Broken computer

I had to deep-breathe my way through the service.

The advancements in technology mean that newcomers to your church will expect smooth, professional quality. When the equipment is glitchy and old or the presenter is technologically inexperienced, the intention backfires. 

Rather than focusing on worship, people are cringing

As you’re creating a tech presentation, use two basic rules of thumb, one for standard weekly performances and one for important services. 

Technology in church done well

For weekly services, as you prepare any kind of technological presentation, ask yourself:  if you were in an office and using this technology in an important presentation to your boss, would you be happy with the quality?

Before important services or if you’re rolling out a whole new kind of technology in your service, it’s time to kick it up a notch. Find someone in their twenties, preferably a professional, and have them sit through the presentation. If they’re cringing, it needs work.

Maybe you can’t afford technology that runs well. Or maybe you don’t have anyone in your church who can use it at a semi-professional (or at least Millennial) standard. That’s okay.

Technology in a presentation

If that’s the case, you’re better off not using technology at all. If it’s impossible to create a technological experience that passes the rules of thumb above, then the consequences outweigh the benefits. It’s better to have a technology-free, smooth worship service than one full of technological glitches.

Once you create a presentation that lives up to the standards above, it’s imperative that you practice multiple times. This is especially important if you’re unfamiliar with any aspect of the tech usage that day. This way, you can work out the glitches and decide if it lives up to your quality standards.

Candlelight service

In the end, technology in church can be like any other worship aide—it can help or hinder connection with God and the Body of Christ, depending on its design. Technology may have taken over everywhere else, but it shouldn’t get a free pass in your sanctuary. Rather, it needs to meet your needs, and those of the people you serve.

Have you recently used technology in your church? Comment below and tell me how it worked out—and if you’re doing anything differently next time!

5 Ways to Address Religious Trauma During Christmas

Healing from religious trauma

A few Christmases ago, the pastor stepped up to the pulpit to begin her sermon. Everyone rustled their bulletins. The pews creaked.

And then everything got quiet. The pastor looked at us. She took a deep breath. And then she didn’t say anything. 

For an uncomfortably long time.

Finally, she began to speak. “I always get nervous when I preach a Christmas Eve sermon,” she said. “There are so many people here. Many of you are here for the holiday. This is my one chance a year to talk to you.”

Christmas decorations
Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash

As your church prepares for Christmas, you also may be wondering how to reach the influx of annual attendees. Why don’t they come every Sunday? What drives them away? And how do you create a welcoming environment that entices them to stay?

As you ponder these questions, I invite you to turn to one group in particular. They’re underserved and sorely lacking in pastoral attention. And one offhand comment could make or break their church attendance for years to come.

These are the people who have suffered religious abuse or trauma.

What is Religious Trauma?

Person experiencing religious trauma
Photo by Nik Shuliahin on Unsplash

Religious trauma is increasingly recognized in psychological circles. Experts now understand that religious abuse can create severe mental health problems, such as depression and anxiety. Some forms require professional help to overcome.

People suffer from religious abuse in a variety of ways. Some people are kicked out because of their sexual orientation. Others are deemed inferior and sinful because of their gender. 

As children, some deal with parental abuse because of their church’s position on corporal punishment. Far too many have suffered physical or sexual abuse by pastors.  And when others turn to church leadership to help with domestic violence, they are ignored.

Some survivors of religious abuse deal with none of those things. Rather, they are told over and over again that they are inherently sinful and evil and that God is angry with them.

Religious trauma can result from indirect contact with Christianity, too. When I moved into the dorms my freshman year of college, few of my peers had experienced religious abuse directly. But most of them still mistrusted me, some of them for years, because of my religiosity.

Thanks to social media and the news, angry Christians had reached my peers, even though they grew up outside religious communities. They had watched their religious friends suffer. They had heard Christians attacking their identity online. And it had created grief, anger, and fear.

And so, even without direct religious abuse, they didn’t trust Christians or religious spaces. No matter how progressive they claimed to be.

Religious Trauma in Mainline Protestantism

In the mainline Protestant churches I grew up in, we rarely discussed this issue. Why? We underestimated the magnitude of the problem and the complexity of the healing process.

Everyone is welcome sign
Photo by Katie Moum on Unsplash

We assumed that people who suffered from religious trauma would already know about our church as a safe space. We assumed that our friendliness would make them willing to give Christianity another shot. And we assumed that attendance in our inclusive churches would automatically heal their trauma after a short period of time. 

But that’s often not the case. Even if people know about your church as a safe space, elements of the worship can still trigger pain from past abuse. Ultimately, you probably share much of the same language, symbols, and Scripture with the church where they experienced abuse.

And, even if they do overcome these hurdles and start attending your church, healing is not fast or automatic.

In a New York Times article, religious trauma expert Marlene Winell explains, “Even after people leave religions where they have suffered abuse, they can still harbor the emotional conviction that they are ‘basically sinful and wrong.’”

Healing from religious trauma
Photo by Milada Vigerova on Unsplash

Welcoming policies aren’t enough here. Even one sentence can trigger memories of past religious trauma for someone. 

Many of my friends with religious trauma courageously tried a more inclusive church. But many were triggered by a pastor’s offhand comment about sin or by the request for donations before the offering.

Even if your statement is well-intentioned, you might accidentally place yourself in the same category as a previous pastor they have met. And if you do, they may not give the church a second chance.

So how to provide compassionate pastoral care this Christmas? Here are five tips for creating a welcoming, safe space for people who have suffered religious trauma.

1. Understand How Religious Abuse Works

Everyone knows about the Catholic sex scandals. That’s a clear example of religious trauma in its worst form. 

Church roof with cross
Photo by Akira Hojo on Unsplash

But there are other, more subtle forms of abuse, which occur across ecumenical circles. I grew up knowing that some people experienced abuse at the hands of exclusionary religious groups. But I didn’t know how deeply it could scar someone until I watched Netflix’s Queer Eye.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the show, five gay men take a week to make over a person or organization, inside and out. In Season 2, they take a trip to Gay, Georgia (pun very much intended by the producers). Their mission:  to reinvigorate the local church.

Early in the episode, the Fab Five visit the church sanctuary to check it out. But one of them, Bobby, hangs back. When his friends invite him in, he shakes his head.

In an interview, he later explained why. “My mother and father were very religious. I carried my Bible to school every day. Christianity was my life,” he says. But for them, “gay people were bad, they were pedophiles, they were evil. So I spent every prayer meeting on every Sunday crying and begging God to not make me gay.” 

Man praying through religious trauma

When he finally came out of the closet, his family and church disowned him.

The trauma from his experience is not superficial, nor easily healed. Decades later, standing on the church’s porch, he still couldn’t bring himself to enter a religious space. 

I had to know where to draw the line for my own mental health, and I think if I had gone into that church, we probably wouldn’t have finished filming that episode that day because I would’ve broken down.”

His story is far too familiar. In my subsequent interviews across the country, I asked about each interviewee’s religious background. Stories like his were shockingly widespread.

As you think about how to serve survivors, it’s important to understand how widespread the problem is and the varied forms it can take.

2. No Judgment

Hand saying no to crossing the street
Photo by Kai Pilger on Unsplash

Now that you understand more about religious abuse, it’s time to learn the Golden Rule:  no judgment.

Likely, you’re not going to tell someone they’re damned to hell. But church judgment can come in subtler forms, too. Maybe it’s a critical joke about your spouse or child in the sermon. Maybe it’s a raised eyebrow as someone tells you about their lifestyle. 

Perhaps most importantly, think about the Christian words and symbols that are often used judgmentally. Words like sin. Or even words like redeem and grace, which are often used in conjunction with theologies of sin and substitutionary atonement.

Open Bible
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

These words are often used to tell people that they’re bad. That they’re inherently evil. That their very being is flawed. That the church is in the shaming and blaming business.

As such, be aware that certain religious words can have a profoundly negative impact. If you want to use them, it really helps to unpack your non-judgmental theology behind it. When you reframe these words in light of God’s unconditional love, you confront and address the shame that comes hand-in-hand with that theology.

(Or you can just steer clear of those concepts altogether).

3. Pastoral Care

Pastoral care healing from religious trauma
Photo by Joshua Ness on Unsplash

Maybe someone comes to you for a one-on-one conversation. Apply the no-judgment rule here, too. 

If they ask about theology or doctrine, you can focus on God’s compassion in your response. Again, try to steer clear of talking about sin, evil, or what your church believes is right vs. wrong. Emphasize everyone’s belovedness.

You can also listen for signs of religious trauma. If you do hear signs of religious abuse, react in the same way that you would if someone divulged physical or sexual abuse. Listen, comfort, and ask what they are needing.

Especially if this person is interested in joining your congregation, you can ask how to make your church a welcoming space for them. Ask what they need in the way of ongoing pastoral care. 

And, if they tell you that they’re triggered by your church or something you’re doing, take note. Think about how you can shift your practices.

4. Get Resources

Woman getting help
Photo by Cristian Newman on Unsplash

As discussed above, religious trauma can be on par with other forms of abuse. It may have even been combined with physical, psychological, or sexual abuse. As such, you may not be equipped to handle everyone’s needs.

So read up on resources in your area, both religious and secular. Find therapists or spiritual directors familiar with supporting the healing of this type of wound. Perhaps you know people in your congregation.

Look for resources to deal with other interconnected issues, too. Find support groups for LGBTQ people kicked out by their families. Look for domestic violence shelters for women and children in abusive Christian households.

If someone comes to you with a history of religious trauma, don’t hesitate to refer them elsewhere. It’s certainly important to extend pastoral care and offer ongoing support. But keep in mind that they may need resources beyond what you can provide. And then follow up with them to see if they’re getting what they need.

5. Worship

Jar of pennies tipped over
Photo by Josh Appel on Unsplash

Most guests with religious trauma will not seek out a one-on-one conversation. Their impression of your church will be limited to your sermon and welcome. So, here are a few ways to avoid triggering them during the service itself.

First of all, do not exert any pressure to give money. Many people with religious abuse were told that their spiritual status was tied financial generosity. Short of that, many people feel churches are too focused on bringing in income.

With a larger-than-normal congregation during the holidays, it may be tempting to speak about the congregation’s leaking roof or shrinking tithes. Don’t. This may very well be interpreted as pressure—even from people unaffected by religious trauma—and may induce them to give less.

On a related note, don’t ask people to come back next week. Definitely don’t make a joke about how many more people there are on Christmas than usual. It will come across as pressure and desperation, which are two experiences especially hard for people with religious trauma.


Christmas tree
Photo by Tj Holowaychuk on Unsplash

It’s hard to minister to a one-off congregation on Christmas Eve. Especially if you want them to come back. So it’s important to know who you’re talking to.

People who have suffered religious trauma and abuse are tremendously courageous to even consider walking into a church. They may still be there under pressure from their family.  If you want to minister to them, recognize what a big deal it is—and think about how you may inadvertently trigger them.

Ultimately, those who have suffered at the hands of the Church need to find an alternative community that will love them unconditionally. That community may not be a religious group—the scars might be too deep. 

But if it is your church, we want to do our best to prepare and welcome them. We may not have caused the trauma. But it is our opportunity—and responsibility—to help heal it.

OK, Boomer: How to Fix the Generation War in Churches

This morning on my Twitter feed I saw an ad for a t-shirt. Huge letters spelled out, “OK, Boomer” in several banner headlines, collar to hem. If you’re not familiar with the term, congratulations for staying out of the worst of the Generation War.

To catch you up:  Boomers have often accused Millennials (and now GenZ) of being entitled, lazy, under-motivated, and over-offended. 

“OK, Boomer” is a sarcastic, dismissive phrase coined in response by young adults, who feel that Boomers are overly critical of Millennials struggling to handle societal problems. They retort that these problems were in fact handed down to them by—you guessed it—Boomers.

And so we get a plethora of memes about frappacino-addicted Millennials and articles on well-off Boomers ruining the economy. It’s been so intense that apparently, the Gen Xers are feeling ignored. (Trust me, I think you guys are okay sitting this one out.)

The thing is, long before generations were hurling insults at each other on social media, there was a raging Generation War in churches, especially mainline Protestant ones.

Ever since congregations started declining, religious Boomers have been blaming secular Millennials for killing their churches. In return, many Millennials have accused Boomers of being irrelevant, old-fashioned, and prejudiced.

Older man behind sunset

But how did we get so divided in the first place? What are the stereotypes we pin on others? How did those stereotypes mangle the multigenerational relationships that have existed in churches for millennia?

And, given the Generation War in churches, should we even try to have multigenerational churches? Or is it time to create separate religious spaces for the different generations?

There’s a lot of discussion on this site about how Gen X and Boomer pastors can reform their churches to meet the spiritual needs of Millennials and Gen Z. Much of that discussion involves some pretty fundamental shifts out of an old way of meeting spiritual needs.

At times, I’ve probably been guilty of some judgmental posting myself. I wish I wasn’t.

So I think it’s time to address the Generation War in churches and how everyone, including this Millennial, can be part of the solution.

OK, Boomer: Here’s what you need to know about Millennials

So your pews are emptying. Maybe you’ve been in this congregation your whole life. Perhaps you were married here. Or you’ve been steadfastly leading this church and others like it for decades.

Empty pews as a result of the generation war in churches

Now, it’s a shadow of its former glory. Sanctuaries that were built for 600 weekly congregants aren’t even full on Easter. You don’t have the money to make needed repairs. You’ve had to end important programs.

Do any of these sound familiar? If so, it’s probably due to a lack of young people in your church. Fewer and fewer young families and 20-somethings are attending and tithing. It might be pretty frustrating and sad.

Response 1: Millennials Suck

Responses from Boomers often take one of two forms. The first is a response most aptly titled, “Millennials Suck.” I’ve heard our generation decried as un-spiritual or even godless. We’ve been accused of hedonism, a lack of discipline, and disinterest in serving others.

Disinterested, unengaged Millennial

Studies actually show quite the opposite. Millennials are service-oriented, more so than recent past generations. We still believe in God and other higher powers. And we’re very spiritual.

We’re just not, on average, very religious.

Here’s why:  the Church isn’t doing a good job of meeting our spiritual needs. We’re trying to deal with modern technology, an impossible housing market, youth with skyrocketing rates of mental illness, an increasingly polarized country, and so much more. 

Capitol building

We need churches to help us navigate those issues as people of faith. We need you to show us where God is in those moments. But for the most part, churches aren’t equipping us to handle these challenges, practically or spiritually.

And, if we do show up, Boomers often take the opportunity to tell us what we’re doing wrong.

You want to know the fastest way to make a Millennial leave your church? Criticize them for having taken so long to show up or for not giving enough to the congregation. Or just criticize our generation more generally.

Works like a charm.

So we’re not coming. And instead, we’re getting our spiritual needs met elsewhere, in places that do help us navigate this new environment. We’re turning to secular clubs or parenting groups. Or sometimes we cobble together a number of traditions to create our own unique brand of spirituality.

Tea and candles

If you’re a Boomer, it’s easy to understand why you’re upset. The church that you love is emptying. And it’s because Millennials aren’t coming.

But this is key:  it’s not our responsibility to go to church simply for the sake of perpetuating the institution. No matter how much you love it. It’s the Church’s mission to meet the spiritual needs of the society around it. 

So if you want to do your part to end the Generation War in churches, drop the stereotypes and think about how you can better serve our unique spiritual needs.

Response 2: Millennials are Unicorns

Here’s the second response:  idolizing Millennials. Maybe you don’t hate us. You’re not frustrated.

You just want us in your pews.

This approach is definitely an improvement on the first strategy. But it still won’t work for you. Here’s why:  this approach tends to treat Millennials like unicorns:  very mysterious, hard-to-catch, and the ultimate prize.

A few semesters ago, I had to visit churches in the neighborhood for a college class. Some friends and I visited a few churches over the course of several Sundays.

Here’s how it went:  we walked in. And just like that, we were celebrities. 

Millennial on phone

Everyone wanted to know who we were and where we were from and, of course, how we heard about their congregation. Was it the band that is now playing once a month? Did their new advertising campaign finally work?

Most of all, they really wanted to know—were coming back next Sunday?

As well-intentioned as this response was, it scared everyone off returning a second time. It was super awkward to be in such a spotlight. It came across as really desperate. 

But most of all, the church still wasn’t focused on meeting our spiritual needs. The focus still remained on how we could be pulled in so that the church could survive. And that approach can still contribute to the Generation War in churches.

If you want to treat Millennials as valuable, that’s wonderful. But don’t put us on the spot or make us feel responsible for reviving your declining church. 

Person standing in a spotlight

Instead, do your homework. As elusive as we might seem, we’re not unicorns.

If you genuinely want to know how to meet our spiritual needs (and thus draw us in), you don’t need to grope around in the dark. There are real data points that can help you reform your church for this time and cultural moment. 

If you want to show us how much you care about us, if you want to get us in your pews, don’t put us on a pedestal. Create a church that meets our spiritual needs.

OK, Millennial: Here’s what you need to know about Boomers

So we’ve addressed some of the most common Boomer responses to Millennials’ secularism. Now we need to take a look at the Millennial contribution. The Generation War in churches goes both ways.

It’s often disconcerting to walk into a church and be scolded or, conversely, treated as a rare celebrity. Both the “Millennials Suck” approach and the “Millennials are Unicorns” approach can understandably turn people off to church.

But here’s what Millennials (myself included) need to understand. When our grandparents grew up, churches provided the very foundation of society.

Ministers and the Bible were easy arbiters of truth. Social lives revolved around church events, not just on Sunday mornings, but throughout the week.

Elderly lady

And, perhaps most importantly, people in that era lived in a universally Christian culture.

People could assume everyone around them believed in similar things that they did. Everyone understood Christian lingo and celebrated Christian holidays. They knew that their kids and grandkids would share that religious and cultural identity.

Being Christian and being American were usually synonymous. And it had been like this for as long as anyone could remember.

Christianity certainly still dominates American culture. But it’s not quite the same anymore.

You can’t just assume that your kids and grandkids will believe the same things you do. Not everyone connects over Christian culture and society the same way they used to. Far fewer people are religiously literate.

Elderly man walks with granddaughter

Maybe you think that this cultural change is a good thing. For the most part, I agree with you. But over time, I’ve learned that it’s important to understand how painful this change is for Boomers (and older).

Even if Christian cultural privilege needs to be lost, it’s still disconcerting and painful for the people losing it.

So, if you want to do your part to end the Generation Wars in churches, try extending a little empathy. The next time an elder in your church comes up to you and lectures you about the secularism of your generation, take a deep breath.

Ask them about what they miss from the church of their youth. And then try gently disabusing them of the stereotypes they have about Millennials.

Should we fix the Generation War in churches?

Is it even worth it? The Generation War in churches is so entrenched. Boomers and Millennials have such different spiritual needs and so many negative stereotypes about each other. Shouldn’t we just create separate services and churches where they can worship?

Absolutely not.

Elderly man with grandson

It’s possible for us to all get our spiritual needs met at the same time. Regardless of when we were born, we’re all living in the same society right now. We’re in the same communities. We’re watching the same things happen in our politics, our culture, and our technology.

And that means that we all need help with a lot of the same questions and problems.

And, more importantly, multigenerational churches are invaluable. Young adults are facing mental health challenges and loneliness in record numbers. We need a community of elders that will love us unconditionally.

So too, elders can lose a sense of purpose and energy as they age. Having young people around to help them out and vision new paths forward, can counterbalance that need. Data shows that in multigenerational communities, everyone is healthier and happier when they’re together.

Baby's hand in elder's hand

We can gripe about other generations all we want, but the Body of Christ is not as rich when we are divided. The Generation War in churches is profoundly weakening to our unity in Christ.

Christian community is defined by our ability to empathize with each other, to step into each other’s shoes. To carry each other’s burdens.

And, most importantly, Christian community is about seeing Christ at work in each person. No matter how worthy we deem their generation.

So let’s drop the stereotypes, have conversations with each other, and sit down to envision the 21st-Century Church together. Who knows? Maybe, by ending the Generation War in churches, perhaps we can bridge the generation gap in society as a whole.

Christian Social Justice: Life-Changing Medical Debt Relief

Debt will tear us apart graffiti

Welcome to the fourth and final installment of my Christian Social Justice series! In case you’ve missed it, we’ve been exploring how churches can reform their mission work to meet the spiritual needs Millennials bring to the table.

In the past two weeks, we’ve looked at relevant, personal, and tangible approaches to natural disaster ministry and immigration justice. Today, we’re tackling medical debt relief in churches.


Person drowning under water
Photo by Ian Espinosa on Unsplash

Medical debt relief is not your grandmother’s church mission work. Debt in general is not a new problem. But in the last few decades, and especially in the last few years, it has been cropping up in new and more pernicious ways.

More and more, the news carries stories of debt-ridden Americans crippled by financial strain. And no generation more so than Millennials. What happened? And how is debt relief–specifically, medical debt relief–a social justice problem that churches can remedy?

How Did We Get Here?

Millennial needing medical debt relief

A few things have taken place. First of all, student loan costs have ballooned. The price of college, adjusted for inflation, has grown 161% since 1987. Meanwhile, salaries have stagnated. As a result, there’s no longer such a thing as being able to fully work yourself through college.

Second, housing prices are on the rise. Especially for young people.

Take Marin County. When my parents married and bought their first house in the early 1990s, real estate was only slightly more expensive here than the national average. Now, over the last thirty years, their house has skyrocketed in value, far outpacing the rest of the country.

For my friends and me, the story will be very different. We grew up here, formed communities and attachments here. Many of us can’t imagine raising our kids anywhere else.

But real estate here is now shockingly expensive. The salary needed to buy the median-priced home is over $230,000 a year. And let me tell you, none of us are making that much.

Which means, after grad school, we’ll be lucky if we can afford to rent a studio apartment in the town where we grew up. And if we do rent that apartment, and pay for the groceries and gas prices that come along with the area, we’ll have very little money left over for anything else.

That’s not unique to the San Francisco Bay Area–it’s happening all over. As a result, even middle-class Millennials aren’t even trying to invest in a house–it’s simply too expensive. So we tend to spend our money on other things. Things that don’t build equity. And thus we often accrue further debt.

The Worst Kind of Debt

Ambulance
Photo by Mark Boss on Unsplash

But there’s one more type of skyrocketing debt that hits the hardest—medical debt.

I have some personal experience with this. I was sick for about eighteen months in 2018 and 2019, at times needing constant care. I took two ambulance rides that weren’t really optional. Saw specialist after specialist. Wasn’t able to work. And on and on.

I was incredibly lucky. I had a family that could support me. I also had excellent insurance, which accepted my claims for everything. I didn’t have extended hospital stays, surgeries, or any of the most expensive kinds of medical needs. I got very, very lucky.

Medical debt relief in a hospital
Photo by Martha Dominguez de Gouveia on Unsplash

A few months later, the bills have started to come in. It’s been a tender time—I’m still recovering emotionally and physically. The stress of keeping on top of the bills and making endless calls to the health insurance company is exhausting.

And I’m lucky. We won’t go into debt.

I can’t even begin to imagine what it would be like for a healthy person—much less a sick or recovering one—to go through this process with the added strain of debt. Especially if that person is elderly. Or doesn’t have a support system.

I know that if I was in debt on top of everything else, it would absolutely hinder my recovery.

I’m one of the privileged ones. John Oliver did a piece in 2015 about medical debt and the people it affects. At the beginning, he points out that people go into this kind of debt “through no fault of their own.” This isn’t reckless spending. It’s spending to live.

Medical Debt Relief

Okay, so medical debt is a huge problem. But how can you actually help? And, more to the point, what does this have to do with church mission work?

What if I told you that churches could make a substantial dent? If I told you that, even with a limited budget, you could cheaply relieve hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars medical debt for hundreds or thousands of people in your community?

(Bear with me for a couple paragraphs of the nitty-gritty.)

Turns out, most debt is for sale. If you owe BlueShield $4,000, they can sell that debt to someone else. Usually, BlueShield would sell it to a debt buyer for a tiny fraction, like $50. Then, that debt buyer can try to collect on the full $4,000.

Medical debt relief in cash
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

If the debt buyer is unsuccessful in their collection, they may sell to another buyer for an even smaller amount, like $5. That buyer can then call you up and try to collect on the full price. And on and on. And eventually, that $4,000 is on sale for pennies.

The thing is, if you buy up that debt, you’re not legally obligated to collect it. It’s all yours. If you choose, you can forgive it. Voilà. Medical debt relief made cheap.

That’s the premise behind RIP Medical Debt, an organization founded by former collectors to promote medical debt relief. Through their organization, you can cheaply buy people’s medical debt and forgive it. (If you want to know more, you can click here to find out the details of how their charity operates).

And that’s what some churches are now deciding to do. In Chicago, a church worked with RIP to buy $5 million in medical debt relief for nearly 6,000 families in Chicago’s South Side. 

The cost to the church? $38,000. Some of which they raised and some of which they donated themselves.

This is a spectacular opportunity for churches, especially ones with low operating budgets. It can be frustrating to see wealthy churches rolling out large-scale mission programs that reach tons of people when you can’t afford to make that same kind of community impact.

Here’s your chance. Reach out to RIP Medical Debt and ask them to work with you. In addition to allocating some of your own funds, you can raise some money. Knock on some doors and become known as the congregation raising money for medical debt relief that will reach some of the poorest families in your town.

A dollar bill describes medical debt relief
Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

In addition to being a wonderful opportunity to affect change, it’s a great way to redefine yourself as relevant in the community. Millennials care about debt, and with rising student loans, GenZ likely will, too. It’s an issue that hugely affects their lives, and it’s something we don’t want to affect others’. It’s timely and hugely tangible in terms of impact.

And, perhaps most importantly, it shows that you can accurately understand and address the needs of our time and culture.


I hope you enjoyed my Christian social justice series. Leave a comment below and tell me what you think—and how your own congregation is pioneering justice for the 21st century.

Christian Social Justice: 5 Essential Steps to Church Immigration Work

Welcome back to Week 3 of the Christian Social Justice series! In case you missed it, we’ve been talking about how churches can create social justice programs that connect with Millennials–and create the biggest possible impact at the same time.

Last week, I went over how churches can respond to the increasing speight of natural disasters across the country. This week, with the DACA Supreme Court case in the news, I’m taking the opportunity to discuss church immigration work.


Border for immigrant at Tijuana
Image by Luis Ramírez from Pixabay 

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few months, you’ve been inundated with headlines about waves of Latin American immigrants and the U.S.’s various policies toward them. And that’s probably been stirring up a lot of feelings, wherever you are on the political spectrum.

If you hold any kind of leadership role in your church, you might be trying to figure out an appropriate way to respond on a congregational level. Easier said than done. It’s hard to take a crisis out of the headlines and create an effective and compassionate response in your congregation. 

Lots of pastors respond with activism, online and in the streets. On Twitter, I’ve seen posts from lots of white pastors reminding us of the Gospel verse, “I was a stranger and you welcomed me.” On my Facebook feed, I’ve seen pictures of clergy marching alongside DACA recipients outside the Supreme Court.

Church immigration work at a protest

None of this is bad, in and of itself.

But the fact remains that most mainline Protestant churches are painfully white, even in border states and cities with huge immigrant populations of color. Why? Because we often confuse activism–online and in the streets–for genuine welcome. 

I want to be clear: Twitter rants and marches have their place. Activism and protest are necessary parts of social justice. But righteous anger is not the same thing as actually welcoming the marginalized.

Mother and daughter

We’ve got a long way to go before we can claim that we are fully following Jesus’ call to include and connect with the foreigners in our land.

Why did Jesus ask us to look out for immigrants in the first place?

Perhaps it’s the sheer number of needs their vulnerability brings. Immigrants, especially poorer ones, need physical safety, nourishment, and shelter.

But they also, like the rest of us, long for community and connection, which is often in short supply after leaving home under duress. And those needs may be magnified by the traumatic experiences that sometimes take place on their journeys.

There are so many angles to caring for the stranger. So many opportunities to enact welcome.

So, in light of the depth and breadth of needs among our siblings, here are five steps to creating an effective, conscientious model for your church immigration work.

(If you don’t live in an area with many immigrants, you can expand this guide to connect with any underserved group in your community.)

1. Determine what group of immigrants needs to be welcomed.

There is no unified “immigrant community” in the United States. So what do the immigrant populations in your community look like?

Globe of the world

Are they predominantly from one region, country, culture, or ethnicity? Are they mostly documented or undocumented? What languages do they speak? Is it mostly single men or families with children? 

There may be more than one population you’d like to serve. For instance, if you live in Southern California, there may be busloads of Central American immigrants passing through. At the same time, you may also live in a community of Mexican day laborers who have been settled for years.

Each community will bring a specific set of needs.

2.  Ask immigrants in your congregation to participate in church immigration work.

Church immigration work with teenagers
Photo by tribesh kayastha on Unsplash

If you already have immigrants in your congregation, make sure to ask them for their thoughts and ideas. 

They may already be painfully conscious of being some of the only people from their ethnic or cultural group in the congregation. So make sure to be discreet about asking. Don’t assume or pressure them into giving you advice. Definitely, don’t put them on the spot.

But offer the opportunity to be involved in immigration ministry both inside and outside the church walls. They may also be able to connect you to community leaders, who already have their finger on the pulse of the needs of the population you’re serving.

3. Ask community leaders how you can be of service to them.

Swearing-in ceremony

The biggest potential pitfall of church immigration work is the white savior complex. The white savior complex is when white communities view themselves as heroes helping “less fortunate” people of color.

The best way to avoid the white savior complex is by coming alongside existing leaders in the immigrant community, rather than creating and leading new projects.

Find immigrant communities’ churches and talk to their pastors. Go to the offices of immigration lawyers in the area. Check in with the leaders of charities. Go to community meetings and call representatives.

Ask each of them: what does this community need? What role can we play in helping you meet their needs?

4.  Think about ALL kinds of needs—physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

Church immigration work with elders
Photo by Ban Yido on Unsplash

Most churches begin (and sometimes end) church immigration work by addressing physical needs, like food, jobs, and housing.

But only offering physical help without forming an emotional and spiritual connection puts up a barrier between helpers and recipients. (Not to mention, it implies that immigrants need physical help but aren’t worthy of real relationship. See white savior complex above.) 

So, in addition to physical needs, think about how to create a welcoming environment that goes beyond physical support.

Maybe the church can connect immigrants with a therapist who can see them for a subsidized rate. Perhaps you can pair up English and Spanish speakers for two-way language lessons.

Church immigration work in Bible study

Maybe your church can host a potluck. Or pair up Spanish and English-speaking families for a dinner once a month. Encourage parents with children to share babysitting duties or swap playdates.

If you’re feeling really bold, think about ways that the church service could shift.

How could your liturgy better accommodate a multi-racial, multi-cultural congregation? Could you invite someone to do the sermon in Spanish once a month, with translation on a screen? Or learn to say the Eucharistic Liturgy in another language?

What about staffing Sunday Schools and youth groups with bilingual volunteers?

5. Ask the community how you can be of service to them.

Church immigration work holding hands

After you’ve talked to community leaders, it’s time to reach out to the community itself. Find some volunteers who are fluent in the language of the immigrant group and set up shop at community events. 

Hopefully, you’ve already created a bond with community leaders. See if they’ll invite you to set up a booth at community meetings, church fellowship halls, or local food banks. 

Make it clear that this is about including and welcoming them—not about trying to boost your attendance numbers or intrude in their space. Remember that you are their guests in their community, not swooping in to save the day.


Statue of liberty

In the end, if you hold any kind of leadership role in your church, you know it’s hard to address justice issues in a timely manner. Truly living out Jesus’ commandment is difficult. It’s a lot harder than Facebook activism or “helping” a community without creating real relationships. 

But the work is worthwhile. Millennials and minorities are calling churches to pioneer effective, personal church immigration work. This is one way you can make a sizeable, relevant, and personal impact in your community. It’s the kind of social justice many Millennials are craving.

Come back next week for my final installment in the Christian Social Justice series on debt relief.

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Christian Social Justice: The Church Response to Natural Disasters

Church response to natural disaster via fire

Welcome to my Christian Social Justice series! In case you missed it: last week, we found out that Millennials are tired of intangible, remote approaches to social justice. Facebook activism and donation-heavy programs simply aren’t cutting it. But how can churches work for justice in a way young adults can understand, connect with, and want to join?

For the rest of the series, I’m going to be discussing examples of effective, tangible, and often personal approaches to social justice issues like immigration and poverty. This week, we’re tackling the Church response to natural disasters.


I’m writing this from a cold parking lot early in the morning, hunched over a dying laptop and a non-functional phone. A hundred of my neighbors and I are eagerly parked around the entrance of our local grocery store, waiting for one precious commodity—ice. Meanwhile, my other family members are at home. They’re filtering water, buying candles, waiting in gas lines, and charging solar-powered batteries.

Sound like a trip back to the Dark Ages? Nope. Just a five-day power outage. Which, in Northern California, is apparently our new reality.

I’m not too upset, honestly. It could be a lot worse. Two families we know personally were evacuated. One nearly lost their house. Thousands of firefighters are spending days breathing in smoke on very little sleep. So, as frustrated and uncomfortable as I am, I know I’m pretty lucky.

Church response to natural disaster via tornado

And I’m definitely not alone. Wherever you live in the United States, natural disasters have been on the rise. Some places have been beset by frequent tornadoes or monster hurricanes. Others have had several once-in-five-hundred-year floods just a few years apart. Or maybe you’re caught up in blizzards with unnatural ferocity.

Science has connected many of these extreme events to climate change. Which, incidentally, is a cause that Millennials care about in record numbers. Even the conservative ones among us. Creating a church response to natural disasters demonstrates that you are taking actionable steps to acknowledge and mitigate the effects of the climate crisis.

(And even if you don’t believe in climate change, hopefully, we can just agree that it’s important to help the victims of natural disasters.)

Past experiences have proven that extreme weather events disproportionately affect the least of these. Sometimes, it’s those who can’t afford to pay for rebuilding costs. Other times, it’s the elderly and disabled, who rely on power and heat to stay alive.

Church response to natural disasters

This means that creating a Church response to natural disasters is no less than a social justice opportunity.

So how do we respond? And how do churches with only a few people on staff provide havens to their communities in times of trouble?

First, a disclaimer:  The point of this article is to get your creative juices flowing and help facilitate a vision. This post is not meant to contradict or replace the advice of emergency services professionals. Any idea discussed here should be thoroughly vetted in conjunction with the laws of your city and state and with emergency services experts in your area. And, obviously, certain ideas are more appropriate for smaller churches, while others are feasible only at big ones.

We’ll begin with four different areas to consider when developing your church response to natural disasters. Afterward, we’ll consider how to prepare for your chosen ministry.

1. Church Response to Natural Disasters:  Social Media

First off, here’s an opportunity to use social media in the most helpful possible way:  turn your feeds into a consolidated source of information. 

During our blackout, we received confusing and often conflicting updates from our Sheriff’s Office, City Hall, City Police, and local utility. Each of these agencies also had text and social media alerts. Then there were the rumor mills by word of mouth, NextDoor, and Facebook. It was a veritable swamp of unreliable information.

You can combat this phenomenon by creating one volunteer as a point person. They can spend their time monitoring the information coming from websites and texts and then consolidate it into coordinated Facebook and Twitter feeds. Trust me, people will be grateful.

2.  Church Response to Natural Disasters:  Maximizing Your Space

Here’s the biggest resource you have to offer:  your building. Most church complexes include a sanctuary, fellowship hall, kitchen, Sunday school/classroom wing, church office, and perhaps a smaller chapel. This is a lot of space. Use it well.

Church response to natural disasters through food

To begin with, the Red Cross offers comprehensive disaster training courses, including one on how to run a shelter, if you want to do that. In the meantime, think through your spaces and how they can become useful.

The most obvious one is the kitchen. Make a cache of food and cooking supplies available so that you can cook for the hungry in the event of earthquake. Buy several industrial freezers filled with ice so you can hand it out and make more if others can’t. Think through how you will cook without gas or power.

Then, there’s the sanctuary. If you anticipate numerous people will be out of their homes, you can turn the sanctuary into a dormitory. Buy sleeping bags, futons, and blankets to put on the pews. String up curtains so people can have some privacy.

You can use classroom space to put up families with babies, disabled people or others who need their own space. If you anticipate people will be there for a long time, you can even have some washers and dryers ready to go.

People charging their phones

Maybe people have access to their homes, but the power is out. Turn your chapel or fellowship hall into a day lounge/work area. Buy up power strips and a generator. Make sure you’ve updated your electrical system to accommodate lights, heating, wifi and charging needs. You can even set up TVs or games for kids.

Or perhaps you anticipate that people will need information. Repurpose your church offices into information booths. If people from other parts of the country are concerned about the welfare of their elderly or disabled relatives, you can funnel their concerns to the police department. Or, you can call the loved ones of people who have made it safely to your shelter.

Both before and during natural disasters, you can establish yourself on social media as a rendezvous point for separated families. In case of the loss of cell phone signal and wifi, connect good old fashioned landlines so that people can check in with their loved ones.

Church complexes, for better or worse, are often equipped with lots of space that they don’t use anymore. Here is your chance to use it for good!

3. Church Response to Natural Disasters: Pastoral Care

Pastor with a congregant

Here is where you can provide a unique service. The emotional toll of a natural disaster is often as bad as, or worse than, the physical one. Make sure your pastoral staff arrives soon after an emergency happens. Invite other pastors, too. Wear a collar or stole so you’re easily visible.

If you’ve only got a small number of people in your building, wander around and offer support. If you’ve got larger numbers, you can section off the church office or other rooms to create a designated space. Online, you can post prayers, collects, and Bible verses.

Alternatively, it’s never a bad time to offer worship. Set aside a room or a corner for the Eucharist and other sacraments, a healing service, or compline for overnight guests. Nothing needs to be fancy or liturgically correct. It just needs to happen. 

Maybe you’re too emotionally exhausted. That’s okay. Reach out to your denomination’s disaster assistance program. Most likely, they will send chaplains to take care of you and the people you’re hosting.

Woman doing yoga

Allow your guests to provide pastoral care to each other, too. If your religious group prays the rosary, meditates, or uses other lay-led prayer practices, find someone willing to lead. If your music staff is around, they can lead those who wish in hymns, secular music, or sing-alongs for children. Even if your music staff isn’t around, chances are, someone will know how to play.

One note:  make sure that none of these are forced. Set up areas for these activities in such a way that everyone knows it’s happening, but people are not forced to participate. Otherwise, it may feel like you’re taking advantage of a disaster to evangelize.

This area is your opportunity to shine, to be a unique resource to your city. Go all-out.

4. Church Response to Natural Disasters: The Least of These

Kids playing

Finally, as you consider which services to provide, think about who will be the least of these in your community’s next disaster. For us this week, it was disabled people, who relied on power for medical devices or heat.

Think about what you can do for those most vulnerable groups. Create a list of your congregants who will need home visit check-ins, or who will need to be driven to the church shelter. Create a go-fund me page for low-income members of your community so that other congregations around the country can contribute.

Make sure the homeless know they can come to your church in case of extreme temperatures or rain. Think about how to support and entertain kids (their parents will probably be pretty grateful as well). Overall, just think ahead about how you can help those who will need it most.


Okay, feeling overwhelmed yet? Deep breath. That was a lot. Again, you definitely do not need to provide all of these services. Just talk to your staff and lay leaders to create the most feasible vision for your church response to natural disasters. Once you’ve got an idea of where you’re going, it’s time to think about getting prepared.

5. Before Disaster Hits: Get yourself prepared.

Put your own oxygen mask on first, people. You can’t help those in your community if your church building is barely functional itself. This often means thinking ahead, months before your “season” of bad weather starts.

The day before the power outage, as we just started to grasp the reality of what was coming, my family and I started to scramble for generators, ice, and other resources.

Too late. Everything was sold out—or behind huge, time-consuming lines. Don’t be like us.

Once you’ve figured out what you’ll need in a disaster, it’s time to get prepared with research and classes. In addition to the Red Cross, check out denominational resources for disaster preparedness and relief. Episcopal Relief & Development has a comprehensive guide on church preparedness here. As another example, United Methodist Insurance made a handy little book, which you can download for free.

If you’re near a disaster zone, visit government shelters or power stations and see what they’re doing. Send your volunteers to help out and get trained while they’re at it.

You can also try to reach out to the local Office of Emergency Services or other government agencies.

Then, bring a vision back to your congregation for your church response to natural disasters. This will often involve raising some money. Maybe you need to buy an industrial generator or re-do the insulation so that you’ll be more resilient against extreme temperatures. Perhaps you need to upgrade your electrical system. You may even need a large-scale remodel to make seismic upgrades.

6. Before Disaster Hits: Get others prepared.

Text alert system

Okay, so your church is weather-proofed. Now you’re ready to think about helping others. This is one way that social media, texting, and the Internet can come in.

Connect as many of your congregants as possible to emergency text alert systems, which will let them know that an emergency has occurred and that you need volunteers. Spend time training.

Shortly before your “season” starts, use social media to broadcast your plan. Share your address and the services you will provide. Forward this information to government officials.

You can use more traditional techniques also—staff a booth at your local farmer’s market. Put up flyers downtown. Go to community meetings.

In the days before an imminent weather event, re-hash your publicity campaign all over again. If you’ve got an especially wonderful group of volunteers, you can even try knocking on some doors.


Creating a church response to natural disasters is a huge undertaking. Heck, the people in charge of the government response to natural disasters are often overwhelmed. It’s not something most churches are doing on a large scale yet, except a few megachurches. But it’s what’s needed. Maybe you only do one thing mentioned above. Maybe you join forces with another church.

Or maybe you don’t do any of these services, but instead encourage congregants to volunteer in other shelters. But in the age of climate disasters, you have a huge opportunity to do something.

And, if you do, this is a chance to enlist Millennial participation. As I said, we’re pretty cognizant of climate change, and we care about its effects a lot. When disaster strikes, churches have the opportunity to serve in very clear, tangible, and relevant ways. Which is exactly what Millennials are craving.

Millennials working

As you work to envision your church response to natural disasters, you can use social media, NextDoor, and other platforms to ask Millennials to sign up to volunteer. You can even hire a few young adults to manage the online part of preparation and implementation.

Just don’t squander this opportunity to make young people central in your social justice outreach. And don’t squander the opportunity for social justice itself.


Come back next week for Week 3 in my Christian Social Justice series–we’re tackling immigration justice!

Christian Social Justice for a New Generation

A few months ago, when immigration was particularly prevalent in the news, I went out to dinner with some friends. Everything was going great–until the topic of immigration came up. With a forkful of spaghetti halfway to my mouth, I suddenly realized my friend staring at me. Actually, glaring.

”I have a bone to pick with the Christians,” he said. “Why aren’t churches saying anything about immigration? Why aren’t they doing anything?”

Christian social justice at a rally

As the Designated Christian at the table, I was floored. I’d spent most of the day on Twitter and Facebook, looking for a Christian social justice perspective on current events. My feed had been nothing but livid Christians, hurling Bible verses and theological insults from opposite sides of the issue. My ears were practically ringing with Christian Twitter’s upheaval. 

Yet my friend (like most other people in the Bay Area) hadn’t seen any of that in his social media feeds. And, as he looked around at the undocumented community around us, he couldn’t see Christians making an impact there, either. As a result, he thought me and my religion clueless, unfeeling, lazy, and/or cowardly. Christian social justice, to him, was an oxymoron.

Obviously, I disagree with his assessment. The churches and pastors I know in California are incredibly passionate about justice work, especially on issues of immigration. I can name countless examples of Christians sharing their beliefs on Facebook or churches sponsoring fundraising drives for important organizations. 

Christian social justice at a march

The problem is, we’re not creating justice in a way Millennials can see, understand, or connect with. Especially the secular ones.

And that’s our problem.

Christian Social Justice Online

Facebook activism is a relatively recent trend. You know what I’m talking about. Maybe you post an article about the latest injustice with a witty caption. Or perhaps your differently-minded friend shared an article on their feed, and you take to the comments for a rebuttal.

Usually, it happens on Facebook, but it can take place on other social media platforms as well. All you need is a comments section, really. This type of activism isn’t part of a church’s organized ministry. Instead, it’s often undertaken by the pastor or congregants as a personal crusade. 

The problem is, it simply isn’t very efficient. 

Twitter feed

That’s for two reasons. First, Facebook and Twitter use algorithms to ensure that we see the content we want to see. If I’m liberal and Christian, I’m going to see your Facebook post on what Jesus would think about climate change. If I’m conservative and/or secular, I won’t. 

Which means Facebook activists are preaching to the choir. They aren’t reaching the secular people in their communities. And that’s why my friend at dinner had no idea about the Christian firestorm that had been all over my feeds.

But even if you do reach someone who disagrees with you, Facebook activism relies on changing minds one at a time. And, usually, those minds don’t want to be changed. 

That’s why most people in my generation don’t do much Facebook activism; in fact, many of us aren’t really on Facebook altogether. We know that diving into the comments section will probably just result in a virtual war no one will win.

But isn’t social media a huge part of Millennial activism? Yes, it is! Think Black Lives Matter and #MeToo. We just do it differently.

Christian social justice on Twitter

For us, it needs to come with tangible, sizable results, like laws being changed or a company reversing a policy. That’s why we like hashtags. They collect groups of people together to generate huge momentum. 

Later on in this series on Christian social justice, we’ll explore ways that social media can aid effective activism. You’ll learn how to add your church’s work to sweeping movements, so that you can help effect large-scale changes. For now, just pause the next time you think about investing your energy into one-on-one social media debates.

Donating time, not money

For much of the late twentieth century, with the dawn of credit cards and the Internet, donations were all the rage. People loved to give money to a cause—it was just such an easy way to affect change.

In response, churches implemented a donation-heavy approach to Christian social justice. Congregants were often asked to donate to specific projects, programs, or charities. Much of that money was passed on to other charitable organizations in the community or denomination.

The problem is, that’s not how Millennials like to change the world. For one thing, we don’t have very much money to give away. For another, we simply like to be more hands-on. 

Christian social justice at a meeting

Social justice for many Millennials is a lifestyle, having to do with the brands we purchase, the food we eat, and the way we spend our spare time. And just like we want tangible results from our social media activism, we want to see the changes we’re creating in our communities, too.

That’s why we like to get personally and often extensively involved with projects that have an obvious impact on our communities. And we like to attack it on multiple fronts, not just through occasional volunteering.

But why should we change?

Okay, so Millennials can’t connect with Christian social justice as it’s practiced right now. Why should you care? Your church has probably been working on crucial projects for many years, perhaps with much success. Is there really a need to change things up?

Yes, there is.

First of all, this is a crucial area to tackle if you want to see young people in your pews. My data shows Millennials searching for churches where they can practice their passion for social justice. For people like my friend at dinner, it is the litmus test for whether or not a church is worth existing. And evidence shows that GenZ is growing up with the same kinds of values.

So, Millennials need to know what you’re doing. They need to connect with it. And they need to feel compelled to join in.

Christian social justice between generations

But also, just maybe, a new generation could bring surprising insights. Many problems, like poverty, are timeless. But our postmodern era brings new justice issues, too–climate change, for instance. Millennials spent their 20s learning these issues and constructing frameworks for pushing the needle. Maybe it’s worth giving them a shot.

So what do we do next?

First of all, Christian social justice programs need to become central to your church. Not just something mentioned in the announcements or before the offering. Not buried in the bulletin. And definitely not just for a core group of your most committed members. Justice, in whatever area(s) you choose to focus on, needs to become a key part of your congregation’s identity.

With that in mind, this series will focus on practical ideas for giving Christian social justice programs a makeover. We’ll explore ways to make tangible, sizable differences in your community. We’ll discuss how to bring Millennials on board. And we’ll think about how these new ideas can link to your congregation’s past experience. Stay tuned for next week’s installment:  how to help your community when disaster strikes.

Stop Advertising Your Church to Millennials and Gen Z

Advertising for Millennials and Gen Z

If you’ve been struggling with an aging congregation, you’re probably thinking about ways to draw some younger folks into your church. And advertising, especially in the form of a trendy social media campaign, might seem like a good place to start. After all, Millennials and Generation Z love that kind of stuff, right?

Well, kind of. But not really.

Practically since we started walking, advertising gurus have sat around in conference rooms asking themselves the same question: how do I get Millennials to buy my stuff? Even before I had purchasing power, I was targeted through an endless parade of commercials, designed to make me pressure my parents into buying me toys. As I grew older, it turned into nonstop social media bombardments. Now, I’m targeted everywhere I look and listen–in my Spotify ads, before, during, and after my YouTube videos, with trendy billboards downtown–the list goes on. As a result, I–and the rest of my generation–are getting both wise and numb to traditional advertising.

Millennial reading advertising on iPad

See, unlike previous generations, I’ve grown up with ads that are targeted so specifically, it’s terrifying. Advertisers don’t just know my gender and age; they know my clothing style, my music preferences, and so, so much more. And then they exploit that knowledge to get my money.

In other words, for my generation, advertising is tainted. On the one hand, it’s a daily reality that often makes life convenient. On the other, it’s associated with people turning our identities into profit.

Of course, I’m used to corporations doing it. But I don’t want that from my church. I want them to care about me as a human being, not just as a young person they want to hook, a consumer who fills their pews and their offering plates.

Here’s another thing. Say you do put together an amazing ad campaign. Say it works. Millennials come pouring into your church. Then what? If they don’t like it, they’re not going to stay. First, you have to create a church that will draw their heart, not just a campaign that appeals to their trendiness.

If not advertising, what, then?

Millennials and Gen Z at a bar

So, if directly “appealing to Millennials” is actually going to drive them away, then where do you go from here? Well, I’d actually suggest backing up. After all, getting younger people in the pews isn’t the point of church. The point is to follow God, who asks the Church to meet the spiritual needs of the community around it.

Don’t fret. Avoiding this kind of marketing doesn’t mean that you won’t have young people in your church. The thriving churches I studied teemed with Millennials. But their pastors told me that they hadn’t advertised hardly at all. Instead, they said, people had simply showed up. News had gotten around by word of mouth. People showed up and liked what they saw. So they stayed, and they told their friends.

In other words, these churches had created a church that met the spiritual needs of young adults. And it worked. So do that first.

So, do I even need a website?

Yes. This does NOT mean that you don’t need an online presence. To the contrary: I’d highly suggest hiring a professional (preferably a Millennial) to design a modern, easy-to-use website. If you want an idea of what your website should look like, check out the web presence of your local megachurch, which I almost guarantee is doing a fantastic job (mine is linked here). Social media accounts are also a must if you want to communicate with young adults about your events.

But the point of this online presence isn’t advertising. Rather, it should be a resource to members, prospective visitors, or people who want some spiritual guidance. It should be an extension of the Sunday service for people who attended. It should also be a resource guide for people who are planning on attending next Sunday.

So if your congregation is aging and you don’t know what to do about it, don’t jump straight to advertising as a quick-fix. First, consider what the new spiritual needs are of the new, younger community around you. Ask yourself how God’s calling you to meet those needs, in addition to those of your current congregation. Once you’ve figure that out and implemented it, then you can re-vamp your website and upgrade your social media presence.

Reorienting your church for an entirely new generation and society is an overwhelming process, and you don’t have to do it alone. That’s what this online community is for. Check back in for articles on how to create a congregation that includes Millennials and Gen Z.